Disc: 1

I've Got You Under My Skin .......... Stan Freberg

That's My Boy! .......... Stan Freberg

When You and I Were Young, Maggie .......... Stan Freberg

Tele-Vee-Shun .......... Stan Freberg

Try .......... Stan Freberg

Pass the Udder Udder / Over to My Udder Brudder .......... Stan Freberg

World Is Waiting for the Sunrise .......... Stan Freberg

Boogie Woogie Banjo Man from Birmingham .......... Stan Freberg

C'est Si Bon / It's So Good .......... Stan Freberg

Dear John & Marsha Letter .......... Stan Freberg

Sh-Boom .......... Stan Freberg

Wide-Screen Mama Blues .......... Stan Freberg

Yellow Rose of Texas .......... Stan Freberg

Rock Around Stephen Foster .......... Stan Freberg

Nuttin' for Christmas .......... Stan Freberg

St. George & The Dragonet .......... Stan Freberg

Quest for Bridey Hammerschlaugen .......... Stan Freberg

Christmas Dragnet (Yulenet), Pts. 1 & 2 .......... Stan Freberg

I've got you under my skin
I've got you deep in the heart of me
So deep in my heart, that you're really a part of me
I've got you under my skin

I've tried so not to give in
I've said to myself this affair never will go so well
But why should I try to resist, when baby will I know so well
That I've got you under my skin

I'd sacrifice anything come what might
For the sake of having you near
In spite of a warning voice that comes in the night
And repeats, repeats in my ear

Don't you know you fool, you never can win
Use your mentality, wake up to reality
But each time I do, just the thought of you
Makes me stop before I begin
'Cause I've got you under my skin

What do I treasure most of all I possess?
It isn't fame or fortune, I must confess.
It's not a house, it's not a book, it's not a precious stone.
It's just a little curly head that I call my own.

Just take a look, ah, that's my boy.
Why, he's his daddy's little pride and joy.
The keeper of the keys to my heart.
Now, what's he gonna do with that poison dart?

Just take a look, ah, that's my lad.
Why, I'm in Heaven when he calls me 'Dad.'
He's all in life I'll ever desire.
See how cute, he sets the mailman on fire!

Little rascal, with his tousled hair,
Always seems so full of life.
Tiny footsteps, scampering here and there.
Just see how proudly he carries that knife!

When he's not giving Daddy a hug,
You'll find him pouring acid on the rug. Cute!
He's just an angel with an axe for a toy.
Ha ha, that's my boy.

Oh, just take a look, ah, that's my child.
Why, to call him bright would be just putting it mild.
He'll talk to you in words just as plain.
See how clear he says, "Derail the train!"

To me that little scamp can do no wrong.
He comes a-running when I call. Look at that!
He's so busy-busy all day long.
Now who's he gone and cemented up inside that wall?!

He falls in love with anything live.
He wants a colt for Christmas - Colt .45!
I'm mighty proud to call him my son.
Ha ha, look at him load that gun. Got his own little shoulder holster!

I'm mighty thankful for what I've got.
But I'm sure glad he's such a lousy shot.
Take a look - missed me! That's my boy!

texttext

Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun (I'm sick of it)
Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun

Hey Mister General Public, do you realize
That we got a generation here of staring eyes ?
Dee women never bother getting housework done
They just sit around gawking at Tele-vee-shun...

The kiddies never run an' playing out of door
On top of that they never bother reading books no more
You ask them who's dee father of our country, mon
They say: 'Was either Walt Disney or Ed Sull-ee-van.'

Oh, Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun
I'm sick from looking on Tele-vee-shun.
I got weak in dee eyes, weak in dee head likewise
From sitting an' looking on Tele-vee-shun...

Dee burglar comes sneaking in and breaks dee latch
While grandma she is looking on dee wrestling match
She throws him on dee floor although she's 90 years old
Says 'I got him with a step-over toe hold' !

I turn on Elvis Presley an' my daughter scream
I fear she having nervous breakdown 'cause of heem
I wonder why he wiggle-waggle to dee beat
As a boy he must have had a loose bicycle seat.

Oh, Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun
I'm sick from looking on Tele-vee-shun.
I got weak in dee eyes, weak in dee head likewise
From sitting an' looking on Tele-vee-shun...

Dee children of dee country eat there dinner, you bet
But they eat it sitting in front of dee TV set
They got pudding in their ears from dee north to dee south
From eating while watching an' missing their mouth

Last night a very unusual thing occurred
Dee baby he is saying his very first word
I have him on my shoulder for to make him burp
Instead, he open his mouth an' say 'Wyatt Ear-r-r-p'

Oh, Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun (Take eet away)
Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun

I watch dee Late Late Movie an' I climb dee stairs
Get into bed an' have tele-vee-shun nightmares
Complete with bad commercials that repeat all night
Both in compatible color an' black-an'-white.

Someday my son grow up an' want to go to sea
So he prob'ly go an' try to join US Na-vee
He get an aptitude test, mon, now here's dee rub
They find heem best-suited for watching Mickey Mouse Club !

Oh, Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun
I'm sick from looking on Tele-vee-shun.
I got weak in dee eyes, weak in dee head likewise
From sitting an' looking on... Sing eet again, mon

Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun
I'm sick from looking on Tele-vee-shun.
I got weak in dee eyes, do you know what likewise ?
From sitting an' looking on Tele-vee-shun...

Vee-deo tape... (Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun)
May help somewhat... (Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun)
But, is it art ?!... (Tele-vee-shun, Tele-vee-shun)
Don't make me laugh !!!

texttext

1.Oh, we grow things mighty big down in Kentucky
But there's nothing in that state that can compare
To a cow that we once had us
And the name of her was Gladys
Boy, you should have seen the neighbors stop and stare.
She stood 10 feet tall and had one purple eyeball
It took eight of us to milk her, here is why:
She had 27 spigots
And the tourists all bought tickets
Just to watch us milk and hear us loudly cry-y-y-y...


(Chorus)
Oh, pass the udder udder and I'll pass it to my brudder
And I'll pass the udder udder dis-a-way
So we passed the udder udder and I passed it to my brudder
Oh, we really had our hands full every day.


2. We created quite a spectacle, I grant you
But we milked her just as pretty as you please
And while people said "How funny,"
We raked in enough durn money
To go out and order ermine BVD's.
Father turned her on her back one Sunday morning
Gladys said "I'm upside down, now what's the gag?"
"Well, the reason why," said Pop
"is so the cream will be on top."
"Gosh," the cow said, "in that case, it's in the bag!"
(Repeat chorus)


3. Now our Gladys was a star in cattle circles
Though she couldn't read or write her name in full
You would think she'd been to college
Although she herself acknowledged
That she gained her fame entirely by pull.
Gladdys said to us one cold and wintry morning
She said "Milking is the thing I dearly loves,
But when I get a cold it lingers
And I can't stand icy fingers
So go on back in the house and get your gloves!"
(Repeat chorus)

Music by Ernest Seitz
Lyrics by Eugene Lockhart

Dear one,
The world is waiting for the sunrise;
Ev'ry rose is heavy with dew.
The thrush on high,
His sleepy mate is calling
And my heart is calling you!

From: Lynncw@aol.com

texttext

Je ne sais pas s'il en est de plus blonde,
Mais de plus belle, il n'en est pas pour moi.
Elle est vraiment toute la joie du monde.
Ma vie commence dès que je la vois
Et je fais "Oh !",
Et je fais "Ah !".

C'est si bon
De partir n'importe ou,
Bras dessus, bras dessous,
En chantant des chansons.
C'est si bon
De se dir' des mots doux,
Des petits rien du tout
Mais qui en disent long.

En voyant notre mine ravie
Les passants, dans la rue, nous envient.
C'est si bon
De guetter dans ses yeux
Un espoir merveilleux
Qui donne le frisson.
C'est si bon,
Ces petit's sensations.
Ça vaut mieux qu'un million,
Tell'ment, tell'ment c'est bon.

Vous devinez quel bonheur est le nôtre,
Et si je l'aim' vous comprenez pourquoi.
Elle m'enivre et je n'en veux pas d'autres
Car elle est tout's les femmes à la fois.
Ell' me fait : "Oh !". Ell' me fait : "Ah !".

C'est si bon
De pouvoir l'embrasser
Et pui de r'commencer
A la moindre occasion.
C'est si bon
De jouer du piano
Tout le long de son dos
Tandis que nous dansons.

C'est inouï ce qu'elle a pour sÇduire,
Sans parler de c'que je n'peux pas dire.
C'est si bon,
Quand j'la tiens dans mes bras,
De me dir'que tout ça
C'est à moi pour de bon.
C'est si bon,
Et si nous nous aimons,
Cherchez pas la raison :
C'est parc'que c'est si bon,
C'est parce que c'est si bon,
C'est parce que c'est si bon.

texttext

Hey nonny ding dong, alang alang alang
boom ba-doh, ba-doo ba-doodle-ay
Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
if i could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom)
if you would tell me i'm the only one that you love
life could be a dream sweetheart
(hello hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again)
Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
if only all my precious plans would come true (sh-boom)
if you would let me spend my whole life lovin' you
life could be a dream sweetheart
Now every time i look at you
something is on my mind (dat-dat-dat-dat-dat-duh)
if you do what i want you to
baby, we'd be so fine
Oh, life could be a dream (sh-boom)
if i could take you up in paradise up above (sh-boom)
if you would tell me i'm the only one that you love
life could be a dream sweetheart
Sh-boom sh-boom ya-da-da da-da-da da-da-da da
sh-boom sh-boom ya-da-da da-da-da da-da-da da
sh-boom sh-boom ya-da-da da-da-da da-da-da da, sh-boom
Sh-boom sh-boom ya-da-da da-da-da da-da-da da
sh-boom sh-boom ya-da-da da-da-da da-da-da da
sh-boom sh-boom ya-da-da da-da-da da-da-da da, sh-boom
Every time i look at you
somethin' is on my mind
if you do what i want you to
baby, we'd be so fine
Life could be a dream
if i could take you up in paradise up above
if you would tell me i'm the only one that you love
life could be a dream sweetheart
(hello hello again, sh-boom and hopin' we'll meet again) boom sh-boom
hey nonny ding dong, alang alang alang (sh-boom)
ba-doh, ba-doo ba-doodle-ay
life could be a dream
life could be a dream, sweetheart
Life could be a dream
if only all my precious plans would come true
if you would let me spend my whole life loving you
life could be a dream sweetheart
(dee-oody-ooh, sh-boom, sh-boom)
(dee-oody-ooh, sh-boom, sh-boom)
(dee-oody-ooh, sh-boom, sh-boom)
sweetheart!!

texttext

YELLOW ROSE OF TEXAS
Stan Freberg

Note:Stan Freberg's voice is indicated by F and the chorus by C

F:Nobody else could miss her
Not half as much as me
She cried so when I - pardon me
That's just a shade loud on the snare drum
C:She's the sweetest little rosebud
That Texas ever knew
Her eyes are bright as diamonds
They sparkle like the dew
F:See now you covered up sparkle like the dew
One of the lovliest parts in the whole -
C:Texas is the only girl for me

INSTRUMENTAL INTERLUDE

F:He covered up the picallos there
Where the Rio Grand is - (snare drum drowns out)
Where the Rio (snare drum)
Where (snare drum)
W - (snare drum)
See my feeling is while I love a good snare drum, I feel that
volume wise it's just a little too much what you're doing there.
See? See, see what I mean? Now you try and hold it there.
I appreciate it.
Where the Rio Grand (I appreciate it)
Where the Rio Grand is flowing
And starry skies (that's better)
She walks along the river
On the quiet (oh that's so much better)
I know that she remembers
When we parted long ago
(You know that there's just a world of difference, oh mercy)
C:She's the sweetest little rosebud
That Texas ever knew
Her eyes are bright as diamonds
They sparkle like the dew
F:See you're slipping back into your old habits again.
Why do you do that. Why do you -
C:Texas is the only girl for me!
F:I love a good snare drum but - hold it hold it hold it.
People people let's go back there the snare drummer
covered up the tra-la-las. We just do it again, smart aleck.
C:Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
Tra-la-la-la-la-la-la-la
F:You see how lovely that turned out? Now that's a darling part.
OK banjo...yug-dugga-dugga. That's purty. That's purty.
Oh now I'm gonna (that's purty)
For my heart is full of woe
We'll do the things together
We did so long ago
We'll play the banjo gaily
She'll love me like (banjo drowns out)
Excuse me, you ain't any kin to the snare drummer, are you?
C:She's the sweetest little rosebud
That Texas ever knew
F:Why do you do that? Why do you burst out like that? It irritates me.
That irritates me. That irritates me, that's all.
But the yellow rose of Texas -
HOLD ON! HOLD ON! Hold on you smart aleck Yankee drummer you!
You can cover up rose, you can cover up yellow, Buddy,
but don't you cover up TEXAS! Or I'll stick your head through that
cotton-pickin snare drum and secede from the band so help me
Mitch Miller I will!
C:And the yellow rose of Texas will be mine forever more
F:Cut it off there. The record's over, you idiot. Stop it,
stop it I say. Just stop it, stop it. I'm getting out of here
(Door slamming). He ruined the ending, one of the lovliest parts
in the whole (opens door, drummer still pounding away, slams door)
piece!

texttext

Yo Rosie, what time is it? I do not know
It's Christmas time, girl, why don1 we go shopping
You and me get some chestnuts, sit on Santa's lap
I got a good stocking and a fireplace
And I'm waiting for you to fill it up buddy

'Cuz I'm gettin1 nuttm1 for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
'Cuz I ain't been nuttin' but bad

I broke my bat on Johnny's head
Somebody snitched on me
I hid a frog in my sister's bed
Somebody snitched on me

Spilled some ink on mommy's rug
I made Tommy eat a bug
Bought some gum with a penny slug
Somebody snitched on me

I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
'Cuz I ain't been nuttin' but bad

I put a tack on teacher's chair
Somebody snitched on me
I tied a knot in Suzy's hair
Somebody snitched on me

I did a dance on mommy's plants
Climbed a tree and tore my pants
Filled that sugar bowl with ants
And somebody snitched on me

I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
And I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad

We're gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
We're gettin' nuttin' for Christmas

So you better be good
The whole year through
'Cuz if you're not, I'm warning you
You'll get nuttin' for Christmas

Nuttin'
I love you Rosie
Come over here you big Santa

[Narrator:]
The legend you are about to hear is true
Only the needle should be changed to protect the record

[St. George:]
This is the countryside
My name is St George
I'm a knight

Saturday, July 10th, 8:05 pm
I was working out of the castle on the nightwatch
when a call came in from the Chief
A dragon had been devouring maidens
Homicide
My job, slay him

[St. George:]
You call me, Chief

[Chief:]
Yes, the dragon again, devouring maidens
The King's daughter may be next

St. George:
Mmm-hmm
You got a lead

[Chief:]
Oh, nothing much to go on
Say, did you take that .45 automatic
into the lab to have them check on it

[St. George:]
Yeah, you were right

[Chief:]
I was right

[St. George:]
Yeah, It was a gun

8:22 pm, I talked to one of the maidens
who had almost been devoured

[St. George:]
Could I talk to you, Ma'am

[Maiden:]
Who are you

[St. George:]
I'm St. George, Ma'am
Homicide, Ma'am
Want to ask you a few questions, Ma'am
I understand you were almost devoured by the dragon, Ma'am
Is that right, dragon

[Maiden:]
It was terrible
He breathed fire on me
He burned me already

[St. George:]
How can I be sure of that, Ma'am

[Maiden:]
Believe me
I got it straight from the dragon's mouth

[St. George:]
11:45 pm
I rode over the King's Highway
I saw a man
Stopped to talk to him
Pardon me, Sir
Could I talk to you for just a minute, Sir

[Knave:]
Sure, I don't mind

[St. George:]
What do you do for a living

[Knave:]
I'm a knave

[St. George:]
Didn't I pick you up on a 903 last year for stealing tarts

[Knave:]
Yeah, so what
Do you wanna make a federal case out of it

[St. George:]
No, Sir
We heard there was a dragon operating in this neighborhood
We just want to know if you've seen him

[Knave:]
Sure, I've seen him

[St. George:]
Mmm-hmm
Could you describe him for me

[Knave:]
What's to describe
You see one dragon, you seen 'em all

[St. George:]
Would you try to remember, Sir
Just for the record
We just want to get the facts, Sir

[Knave:]
Well, he was, you know, he had orange polka dots . . .

[St. George:]
Yes, Sir

[Knave:]
Purple feet, breathing fire and smoke . . .

St. George:
Mmm-hmm

[Knave:]
And one big bloodshot eye
right in the middle of his forehead and
Uh, like that

[St. George:]
Notice anything unusual about him

[Knave:]
No, he's just your run-of-the-mill dragon, you know

[St. George:]
Mmm-hmm
Yes, Sir
You can go now

[Knave:]
Hey, by the way, how you gonna catch him

[St. George:]
I thought you'd never ask
A Dragonet

3:05 pm
I was riding back into the courtyard
to make my report to the lab
Then it happened
It was the dragon

[Dragon:]
Hey, I'm the fire-breathin' Dragon
You must be St George, right

[St. George:]
Yes, Sir

[Dragon:]
I can see you got one of them new .45 caliber swords

[St. George:]
That's about the size of it

[Dragon:]
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha
You slay me

[St. George:]
That's what I wanted to talk to you about

[Dragon:]
What do you mean

[St. George:]
I'm taking you in on a 502
You figure it out

[Dragon:]
What's the charge

[St. George:]
Devouring maidens out of season

[Dragon:]
Out of season
You'll never pin that rap on me
Do you hear me, cop

[St. George:]
Yeah, I hear you
I got you on a 412 too

[Dragon:]
A 412
What's a 412

[St. George:]
Over-acting. Let's go

[Narrator:]
On September the 5th, the Dragon was tried and convicted
His fire was put out and his maiden-devouring license revoked
Maiden devouring out of season is punishable
by a term of not less than 50 or more than 300 years

texttext

This is the season.
My name's Wednesday.
My partner's Frank Jones.
The Chief's name is Captain Kellogg.

December the 24th, Christmas Eve.
They brought in a guy named 'Grudge'.
When I heard what they booked him on, my blood ran cold.
It was a 4096325- 096704: not believing in Santa Claus.

4:35 p.m.
I was working the holiday watch out of homicide with Frank.

"Hang up your stocking yet, Joe?"

"Yeah, just before I come down. You too Frank?"

"Alway do.
Hung it up early just in case I have'ta work late tonight.
Wouldn't wanna miss out on when Santa Claus comes you know. "

"Sure wouldn't, be a shame."

"Whatcha gonna do tomorrow, Joe?
Whatcha gonna do on Christmas, got any plans?"

"Nothin' much."

"Why don't you come by the house Joe?
We're gonna have Christmas dinner.
You know, all the trimmings:
turkey, celery stuffing, oysters maybe.
Chestnuts, all the trimmings, you know.
Cranberry sauce, love'ta have ya.
The Missus always fixes a plate of relish
with them little carrot sticks.
You know, olives, pickles, scallions.
Most people call them green onions, but they're really scallions.
Did you ever notice that Joe?"

"Notice what Frank?"

"How most people call them green onions but they're really scallions."

"Uh-huh. Scallions."

"Anytime after two, Joe. Love ta have ya."

"Uh-huh. Well I'll see."

"Love ta have ya."

"Uh-huh. Well, I'll see."

"Love ta have ya."

"Uh-huh. Well, I'll see."

"Missus always fixes a plate of relish with them little carrot sticks.
You know - olives, pickles, scallions."-ac